Why Do We Stay Quiet……
Recently I heard this statement from Shane Parrish (he has a fantastic podcast called The Knowledge Project), in a conversation he was having with the great Seth Godin……
“So many advantages come from being willing to look like an idiot in the short term.”
Now, I’m not sure I’d use the word idiot myself, but I do agree completely with the sentiment. It’s so often our fear of embarrassment that keeps us quiet, that keeps us from asking the question, or stops us from putting forward an idea that might be the game changer.
I can see plenty of times in my own life where I’ve held back for exactly that reason. I didn’t want to look silly. I didn’t want to risk being wrong. So I stayed quiet. And in these moments, nothing grows.
Because the truth is….:mistakes and failure aren’t signs we’re falling short….they’re the very fuel of personal growth. Every stumble carries the seed of learning. Every wrong turn has something to show us, if we’re willing to see it.
Of course, being open doesn’t mean we have to speak for the sake of it. Silence can often be the wisest path. But we shouldn’t stay quiet about what we believe in. If something matters to us, or to the people around us, it deserves a voice.
As I’ve grown older, I’ve noticed this has shifted a lot for me. I’m more at ease with myself now than I was when I was younger, and I care a lot less about how I’m perceived. But that doesn’t mean it’s gone away. I still have to keep noticing the moments where I think about pulling back just to protect my image, and remind myself to step forward anyway. And when I do, something interesting always happens.
People lean in. Conversations open up. Ideas move forward.
So maybe the question isn’t, “How do I avoid looking foolish ?” but rather, “What do I lose if I don’t say this ?”
It’s rarely the stumble that costs us. It’s often the silence.
A thought for all of us:
Where in your life are you holding back something that needs to be voiced ?
What might shift if you gave it words ?
Talk soon, Paul
P.S. If this struck a chord with you, it’s exactly the kind of work I do in my coaching. I help people find the clarity and courage to speak up, make better choices, and create the conditions for a life that feels more aligned. If you’ve been sitting on something you want to shift, I’d love to have a conversation.